Some days it is very difficult for me to work. I know most of the people there do not know that I have lost a son, but it is a matter of life going on around you as if nothing as happened and you just have to jump right in there and go along with it even if you don't feel like it. Even though I have found peace with Jeremy's death, I still feel so empty inside. I still feel like the world shouldn't just go on as if nothing happened. It should somehow acknowledge that a person has passed away. I know that isn't very reasonable but I don't always feel very reasonable.

The only way I can make it through is to bring myself back to realizing the peace and happiness my son is enjoying at this time. I sometimes think of him being the same age as Jesus was when he died. If people don't age once they get to heaven he's the same age as our savior up there. Maybe that makes them closer somehow. It's a nice thought anyway.

The days come and go even when I would rather they didn't, and work calls me on right now so I better go put a smile on my face and face the world around me with all their returns from the Christmas season.