It has been quite some time since I wrote in my blog. I got hung up with not having a working connection and working hours that were a bit odd. But another reason is that I have moved beyond the grieving process. I have started living again. One of the first things I did was to attend the gem show and found many interesting things. I found things interested me again. That in itself was a new beginning.

Lately I have been finding out some of the frustrations that Jeremy lived with as he grew up. One of the main things I am dealing with now is hearing. Jeremy had a 95% hearing loss as he was growing up and many times people would get annoyed with him and say he just didn't want to listen, but the truth was, he couldn't hear them. I am experiencing that myself lately. If someone says something to me and I don't hear them, they get annoyed with me and get offended. Some seem to think it is because I am saying that they don't speak clearly. I'm not, it isn't their fault, it is that I can't hear. But I don't want to not be able to hear. I don't want to not answer people because then it will let them know that I really haven't heard anything they said.

Mom had that problem too, and she used to smile and say umhum and nod her head a lot. She didn't hear what you said, but she didn't want to ask what you said. If I don't hear what you say, I'm going to ask you. But I know now why Jeremy and Mom didn't do it, because it does make you feel as if you are doing something wrong on purpose if you can't hear.

You can hear a lot but not listen at all, or you can listen, but hear very little. I hope you don't have the problem as Jeremy had with hearing. But I also hope, if you don't have trouble hearing that you will be patient with those that can't hear. And never ever make them feel as if the problem lies with their unwillingness to listen.